St George!!!

Jake and I had a fabulous weekend in St George. Why was it so good you ask? Well, the number one reason is probably that we had no kids with us. Don't get me wrong, we love our kids, but everyone needs a break once in a while. Jake's family kindly agreed to watch the kids, (thank you!)so off we went.

I had to practically drag Jake to get him away, but once I got him there it was great. The weather was perfect. I'm not a hot weather person, so the mid-60s that we enjoyed was perfect. We went mountain biking and I got to try out my new bike. I've got lots to learn, but it was super fun.

We went shopping for a whole afternoon. Rare for me, but I've picked up a bunch of extra shifts so I was saving my money for a good ol' shopping spree. Very fun. Shopping's definitely more enjoyable when you have money to spend:)

Don't feel too sorry for Jake. He had his own shopping spree at the golf store where he bought new clubs. Lucky boy. So then of course we had to use them. First to the driving range where I tried for my first time to hit a golf ball. The next day I actually golfed 9 holes (is that how you say that?). This was definitely a first for me. I picked up my ball frequently so as not to be there all day, but I don't think I did too bad considering it was my first time. I actually enjoyed it. Might have to start doing that more.

It was so nice to have time with just Jake. I have to admit that I wondered if I'd be able to think of anything to talk to him about besides kids and work. Sometimes it seems like that's all we have to talk about. I was excited to enjoy talking to him all weekend long with a rare mention of the kids and no mention of work. Wahoo!!

All in all, a great weekend. Definitely a reminder that we need spend more quality time together. Also a good reminder of why I love my hubby:) We took a couple of pics, but I'm too lazy to get the camera, so you can enjoy this lovely pic of St George.

Spring 2010

I haven't put pictures on here for a long time. So now you get to see a bunch. I'm sure most of you have noticed that neither Jake nor I are great at taking lots of pictures. We don't snap pictures of every little thing we do. We need to do better so our kids' lives are somewhat documented. My goal for the winter (because I know I won't do it in the summer) is to get pictures organized and printed into books. We'll see if it happens.

There hasn't been anything too exciting happening of late. Probably the biggest thing we've been working on is landscaping. Yep, weather gets warm and we start working in the yard. You'd think it would look better considering how much time we put into it. So lots of pictures are from last Saturday when we ripped down the old fence (yucky barbed wire) and put posts in for the new fence. The kids loved the tractor. I loved the warm weather. Jake mistakenly let me put the posts in, which meant I had to line them up straight. So we ended up pulling two out and doing them over again. Maybe next time I'll get to drive the tractor:) This weekend we'll be pulling wire for the fence. I have no idea how that works, good thing I have Jake.

I pretty much have no pictures of Easter. Like I said, I'm really good at taking pictures. We didn't do Easter clothes this year in the name of saving money. If we had I'd like to think I would have gotten the camera out.

Sorry about all the pics of Sage, but she's so cute how could I leave them out? We finally took some pics of her, so I thought I'd share. She's 8 1/2 months. Crazy how time flies.

Anyway, that's about all we've been up to. I'll try to post pics of the finished fence before too long. Maybe this year we'll actually plant some flowers!

My Mom Would Be So Proud

Those of you who know me well know that I am not domestic. At all. Ok, so I've learned to throw together a meal or two, but Martha Stewart I will never be. I've never enjoyed 'crafting', probably never will. And that's never really bothered me. I'm ok with not being a crafter. When I go to Super Saturday Craft Days I socialize with friends and eat some good food. I never come home with a craft. Enough said.

My mom was a super homemaker. She did everything well. Crafting, cooking, sewing...most especially sewing. She tried to get me to learn, but I had a deep aversion to the sewing machine growing up. I think it's genetic because Mom said when I was little anytime she took me to a fabric store I screamed the second we walked in. Lately my aversion to sewing has diminished and I've wanted to learn. Probably has something to do with the beautiful quilts I see my mom and sister make. A few months ago I picked up a sewing machine for free. I took it to my mom and she showed me how to thread it. Holy cow. I had no idea it was that complicated. I brought the machine home and its been sitting unused on the counter.

Well today, miracle of miracles, I got the sewing machine out. I figured I could teach myself to thread it. It couldn't be as hard as I remembered, right? Two hours later I finally figured it out. Thank goodness for the internet. So I'm on my way. Baby steps right? I'm not focusing on the fact that I stupidly wasted years of opportunity to have my mom teach me. Instead I'm moving forward in hopes that some day I might make something my mom would be proud of. Martha Stewart here I come!

To those of you who can sew: Now what do I do? :)

I am not Stressed!!!

"I am not stressed!" My mom said this once when she was obviously very stressed, and we still laugh about it. This is what I feel like shouting lately. I've been working more, life is just busy, and stuff. Thus, my brain has decided to quit working. I used to pride myself on functioning well with stress, not so much now. I left my keys at the bank and forgot Zack at school all in one day. I cannot remember anything.

Jake asked me if I'd heard of something before.

"I don't know," I said.

"How can you not know?"

"Well, right now it doesn't sound familiar, but that probably just means I've forgotten it."

So if this post makes no sense and you see me looking frazzled, just remember, 'I am not stressed!'

Grieving

I'm still here, in case you were wondering. I keep thinking about writing, but then I don't know what to say. Every day is a roller coaster of emotions. Rather than look at life by the day, I go by the minute. I'm grateful for every good minute but have realized that a good minute can quickly be followed by a bad minute. Countless times during the day I think of something I need to tell my mom, and then remember that I can't. Then I feel the pain and sadness. I try to not let it consume me because I don't want to be a sad, bitter person. So I keep going and put a smile on my face for my family. And then at night I let some of the sadness out.

I've been thinking about grieving and friends/family. Before going through everything with my sister and mom I had no idea how to support someone who was grieving. I didn't know what to say or do, so more often than not I didn't say or do anything. Now I know better. In fact, I think my family could offer grief support classes. So here are some of the things I've learned that help. A lot of these things I learned from people who did them for me. Some people are natural at grief support. I've never been one of those people. So if you're like me and need some help here are some pointers:

1. Don't just ask, do. If you ask me if there's anything you can do I'll say no, because I don't know myself and I don't want to be a burden. But if you just tell me you're going to do something I won't turn you down.

2. Don't avoid the subject. Acknowledge what happened, say your sorry, anything. If you're willing to talk to me about it then I know I can talk to you when I need to.

3. Send something. It doesn't need to be a gift or flowers. Just a card or even an email. Something to let me know you care.

4. If possible attend the viewing and/or funeral. I've learned even more that funerals are for the people grieving, not the deceased. It means a lot when friends and family go out of their way to express their sympathy.

5. Stop by. Come visit any time. Bring by some good comfort food, a box of kleenex, or don't bring anything at all. Just a listening ear is nice.

6. Listen. So important. If you ask me how everything is, don't get uncomfortable and change the subject when I start to talk. Just listen.

I could go on, but that should get you started. Thanks to everyone for your friendship and support. I know grief support isn't easy, but its definitely appreciated. To finish up, this has become one of my favorite quotes. I hope you enjoy it as much as I have.

"It isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out. Don't worry. It will all work out. Put your trust in God and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. He will not forsake us. If we will put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers." - President Gordon B. Hinckley

Legacy

My mom passed away yesterday afternoon. She was 54 years old, and in that relatively short time she managed to leave behind an amazing legacy. She left behind a legacy of unconditional love, service, and any good quality you can think of. I look at my life and realize that I'd better start working a lot harder because I want to leave a legacy like her's.

I'm happy my mom isn't suffering anymore. The last few days were hard to watch. But I miss her. Almost every memory I have includes my mom in some way. Everything I look at reminds me of her. I know I'll keep doing my best, but it will be a lot harder without my best friend and mentor.

I'm happy to think of my mom and Linz together again. I'm sure mom was so happy to see her. I know that even though I won't see my mom again for a long time she'll still be a big part of my life. I'll still try to do what I know would make her happy. And I know that she'll do everything she can to help me from the other side. I look forward to seeing her and Linz again.

Snow!

This weekend has been filled with fun snow events. Up until last week we had no snow. Now we've got a couple feet and it's still coming down. We probably got about 18 inches just this weekend. Craziness! But fun too. I love good snowstorms. We didn't make it to church because they never plow our circle and I got stuck. I guess there were only like 10 families who managed to dig out and make it to church. Snow day!

On Friday Jake and I went skiing at Sundance. We decided the winters are so long in Midway that we need to start having more fun in the snow, so we got season passes. Good thing because it's going to take me all season to figure out how to ski. Friday was pretty sad on my part. Poor Jake is probably wondering why he married someone who is so untalented in snow sports. Oh well, at least I try:)

On Saturday we took the kids to watch a ski race at Soldier Hollow. It was the olympic qualifier for the event (not sure what the event was called). Super cool though. There were people competing from all over the world. It was fun to hear all the different languages. Those guys are crazy good on skis. Fun.

Poor Jake started shoveling snow today at 7:45 and didn't finish until 10:00. Poor guy. I don't feel too bad for him though. He refuses to buy a snow blower because he just wants to get a 4-wheeler one day. Although even the snow blowers had a hard time because the snow is so heavey. I can only lift like half a shovel at a time. We had to play in the snow because how can you pass up snow like this. The piles are so high from our driveway that the kids have their own sledding hill in our front yard. Very fun. Jake is currently using a 4-wheeler to plow the street in front of our driveway. The city came and did two passes in the circle and then left, leaving a huge pile of snow still in front of our driveway. Got to love what our taxes pay for. So yes, winters are long in Midway, but at least we have fun.