Three Years

Missing you tons Linz. I can't believe its been three years. It feels like forever, and we still have so much longer. I wish my kids knew their Aunt Linz. I wish they could play and have fun with you. I wish I could run another race with you. I wish lots of things and I know some day they'll happen. Sending my love up to Linz today! "It will never be Zion without you!" Or something like that. From the Legacy movie. Linz was always way better at quoting movies than I am:)

Mother's Day

I think Mother's Day will always be bitter sweet. I hope one day it's more sweet than bitter, but right now it feels more bitter than sweet. Jake and the kids do a great job making part of the day sweet. Jake understands that its a hard day for me. I feel bad not just enjoying the day, but it's hard.

I miss my mom. I miss her all the time. I miss her when something great happens and I want to share it with someone. I miss her when something hard happens and I want to cry with someone. Life has been hard lately. A little harder than normal, and boy have I missed Mom. I want to go visit her on Mother's Day, just like everyone else. I want to take flowers to her house, not to the cemetery. I know I'll see her again. I know she knows what's going on in my life and helps me as much as she can from the other side. But I'm selfish and I want her here. So, on this Mother's Day, and this week of my mom's birthday, my heart will be with my mom even more than normal.

To all of those who have been without their mom for a while, I feel for you. Its hard. I can do hard things. I can do hard things. I am so blessed:)

Easter and Stuff

I haven't written for a long time. Life has been crazy busy. I've been working tons to help pay the bills while Jake's business is slow. I'm so grateful for my job and the income it brings. But I have a new respect for working mom's. Its so hard. I miss my kids. Suddenly I'm supposed to work and do everything I usually do, all in a lot less time. Some things have to go, and blogging has definitely been one of those things (not that I was super good at it before).

Anyway, Easter was great. I love celebrating the resurrection. Sometimes it seems as though half of my family is on the other side, waiting for that day. I can't wait. I'm so grateful for a loving Savior who made it all possible.

So we did the usual easter egg hunts, and yummy food. The kids actually looked cute thanks to Tracy. They loved their new Easter clothes. Kate was excited the next week when I told her she could wear her new dress on other days besides just Easter. Poor girl thought she could only wear it once a year:)

Zack had his first grade program. It was so great. He worked hard all year to learn all the songs. He even did a dance with a girl. Too bad he never learned the girl's name:) I was so proud of him. I can't believe I'm about to have a second grader. Crazy! How is that possible when I'm only 26?:)

Hope

Jake and I were able to go to the Carl Bloch exhibit at BYU. Amazing. Definitely an inspired man. My favorite painting was this one entitled 'The Daughter of Jairus'. So beautiful. Its been on my mind ever since I saw it. So I thought I'd share my thoughts. Lucky people:)

The detail in the painting is beautiful. I wish you could see the full size. The mother is weeping over her daughter who just died. This comes, I would imagine, after a long night of struggling and praying. I'm sure at this moment the mother feels grief and despair at having lost her daughter. But then you look to the right corner of the picture and see Hope. The Savior and a disciple walking into the house, the morning sunlight shining behind them. So beautiful.

This is what I think of when I'm having a rough day. When the night seems so dark. When it seems as if morning will never come. Just when you think you can't take it anymore, the Savior is there to lift us. I admit that I lose sight of this often. Its hard to remember when I'm in the middle of it all. Sometimes it seems as if the clouds have gathered above me and the light will never come. But it does. It always does. I like to think that if I have faith, one day, just when I think I can't take it anymore and all is lost, the Savior will arrive. The Light will come. There is always Hope.

Happy Birthday Linz!!

Wish you were here to celebrate!

Winter Fun

Winter is not my favorite time of the year, but doing some winter activities definitely makes it more enjoyable. In fact, I've decided it's necessary to do some kind of winter sport to keep your sanity through our long winters.

Jake and I used our Warren Miller passes to ski at the Canyons on Monday. Tracy was super nice to come watch our kids so we could play. It was so much fun. Pretty much my favorite ski day ever. The snow wasn't awesome, but the sun was shining. For me a sunny ski day is a perfect ski day. Jake and I have both transitioned from snow boarding to skiing. I'm really liking skiing. Two feet facing forward is a good thing I think. I'm a solid blue skier, and totally happy with that. I'm pretty sure I don't care to ever do any blacks. That might change when my kids and husband take off on the blacks and leave me alone. Zack's been taking ski lessons this year and loving it. Best thing we ever did. He's totally in control now and really enjoying it. Love it. Hopefully all of our kids will grow up skiing. How can they not when we live so close to like 5 different ski resorts?

We also took the kids out to the lake to walk on the ice. They thought it was pretty cool. So did I. Very cold though. I don't understand fishing on a beautiful sunny day. Ice fishing I'll never understand.

How many of you can drive 5 minutes and walk on top of a lake? Yet another reason to live in Midway. If you come visit maybe we'll take you out too:)

The Bingham-Spjutes!

Our family keeps growing and growing. Its great. The more the merrier right? My dad got remarried to Kathy Bingham last Saturday. I'm so excited for him to not come home to an empty house with hot dogs for dinner every night. This will be a good thing.

Jake's mom is also remarried. The grand total between Jake and I is: 2 parents, 2 step-parents (they're not evil as portrayed in movies by the way), 9 siblings and siblings-in-law, 20 step-siblings and siblings-in-law, 8 nieces and nephews, and something like 25 step-nieces and nephews. I think that totals like 66 in all. Holy cow. I'm still figuring out names. I'm kind of old so my brain doesn't work like it used to. Our poor kids I think just figure they're related to about everyone. They don't question us when we tell them they're related to someone, they just nod and smile.

Anyway, the wedding was great. They were married for time in the Salt Lake Temple, and the sealer did a great job. Then we did pictures and had some yummy food. It was a good day. Somewhat bitter sweet, but mostly sweet. My dad and Kathy have been in Hawaii for the last week. I'm hoping my dad will like it so much that he'll want to take us all some day. Well, that would have to be after he wins on Minute to Win It (I was going to say the lottery but there is zero chance of that happening...and it made me smile to picture my dad on minute to win it).

Here are some pictures of the grand event. Ok, mostly they're pictures of us waiting for Dad and Kathy. I dropped the ball on getting actual pictures of the happy couple... Maybe I'll steal some from Mel's blog:)

PS At the dinner Kate told me that she thinks our new grandma is really nice. So my kids give her two thumbs up!