A Little R & R

Let's face it, it's hard to take a vacation with the kids and come home feeling relaxed and ready to conquer the world. Well, we managed to do that in St George last weekend. We rented a house with our friends and it was so much fun. There was air hockey, ping pong, and pool inside the house. But the best part was the back yard. Talk about a paradise. It had a beautiful pool with waterfalls, a hot tub, swings, playhouse, and enough grass to play an intense game of soccer. The pool was heated so we were able to swim outside in January. Heaven! The only time we left the house was to drive around the corner (literally) and hike in Snow Canyon. It was truly the perfect vacation. The kids were happy and entertained so the adults were able to relax too. We were also able to get some good playing in with the kids. There was good company, good food (a must on vacation), and just an all around good time. The kids are already asking when we can go back. It was such a good vacation that we just might have to make it a tradition.

Death Is Not the End

Yesterday was two years since my mom passed away. I think this video clip says it all. Can't wait to see you again Mom!

Christmas Happenings

Christmas is gone. Holy cow! Still no snow. Craziness! We had a great holiday season this year. We had lots of fun just playing together, seeing the lights at temple square, and just enjoying the season. Zack got so many tracks to put together that he spends all of his time playing in his room. Jake made Kate and Sage the ultimate kitchen. They love it (and they'd better for all the time it took)!

On top of all of that my sister Alicia got married. It was so great. They're so happy and we love her husband Dan. I got a picture of the girls carrying her train, but of course didn't get a picture of the dress. She was stunning, you'll just have to take my word for it.

So here are a million pictures for your viewing pleasure:)

Christmas Tree Adventures

We embarked on another Christmas tree hunt yesterday. I love this tradition. There's always something to laugh about. This year the good times were my fault. There's no snow at our house, so I didn't really think there would be much snow when we got our tree. Silly me. When will I learn? You'd think it was our first year living in this winter wonderland. Anyway, not only did I not take snow pants, etc. I didn't grab mittens for the kids. Yes, I'm awesome. We really didn't have to walk far to get our tree. But we were in snow, pretty deep snow at that. It took one fall for Sage and she was crying so hard I had to take her back to the truck. So, in keeping with tradition, Jake and Zack continued in the quest to find the perfect Christmas tree. They definitely found it. After a year of being made fun of for his tree last year, Jake got the biggest tree he could find. He was so proud of himself. He even used a regular saw, not his chainsaw, truly sticking it to the man. I have to admit, they did well this year. Good times. This is what tradition is all about...stories to tell over and over every year:)

Pictures

I hate to leave that last post there forever. So here are some random halloween photos. I didn't want to give anyone a heart attack by taking really good pictures, so here you go. Good thing my kids are so cute... Obviously Sage was loving the candy. Jake said she tried to take whole bowls of candy rather than just one or two pieces. How embarrassing.

Believe

My heart has been aching lately. I'm not sure why. You'd think its been enough years since Linz and Mom have been gone that it wouldn't hurt so much. There are definitely times where the hurt is less. I'll think "yes, this is finally getting better." But then an unexpected knife goes through my heart and the wound opens wide all over again.

I wish I'd realized how good I had it B.E. (Before Everything). I had no idea. I thought I understood loss and heartache. I had no idea. In my heart of hearts I know that I've learned much I would have never learned otherwise. I'm grateful for this, really I am. But some days I just want to shake my fist at the heavens. Why does God think I can handle this? Why did we have to lose both of them? Why can't it just be like it was before? I would give just about anything to walk into my parents' house and see my mom standing behind the counter, excited to see me. I would love to see my kids play with Linz. These are not big things I want. They're simple really.

So I'm here, A.E. (After Everything) trying to figure things out. It seems that just when I feel I'm making progress I take a step backwords. So I'm going to rally. I must pick myself up, gather my faith, and take a step forward. This is me rallying:

I'm grateful. I'm grateful for compassion. I'm grateful that I know how to cry with someone else in their heartaches and understand a little of what they feel. I'm grateful for perspective, an eternal perspective really. I'm grateful to be a part of a church that teaches that eternal perspective. I'm grateful for family. So grateful for family. Jake and my kids keep me going every day. I'm grateful for how close my siblings and I have gotten through all of this. I'm grateful to now be related to 60 people who I wouldn't even know if Jake and I hadn't lost parents. Most of all I'm grateful for my Savior, who loves me and cries with me. Even though I don't understand, I can still believe. So, to end this uplifting post (sorry, sometimes I have to let it out) here's a scripture that's been helping me a lot lately. Its in the Book of Mormon.
Mosiah 4:9
"Believe in God. Believe that he is and that he created all things both in heaven and in earth. Believe that he has all wisdom and all power, both in heaven and in earth. Believe that man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend."

Fall!!!

I love fall. I love the crisp feel in the air. I love sitting in front of a fire. I love watching football. And I especially love the beautiful fall colors. It doesn't get better than living in Midway in the fall. The leaves are amazing just from our front yard. Then we take a quick drive to the mountains and it's so beautiful I can hardly stand it. Why more people don't live in Midway is beyond me. I hope we live her for forever. These pics are from a Sunday drive a couple of weeks ago. You should all come visit in the fall. Love it!