A couple of weeks ago me, Mel, April, and my dad went to see Little Women at the theater in Centerville. Such a great show. I'd never seen it before and it had been a while since I heard the music. Little Women has always kind of been my family's theme book. We love it and quote from it often. One of the last songs in the show is called 'Days of Plenty'. I've included the lyrics below. They're amazing, and I've been thinking about them a lot lately.
In the show its the mom that sings this song. Obviously my mom can't sing this, but I think everyone in my family can. This song totally makes me think of my mom and Linz. I know they want us to have days of plenty. I know they're cheering us on and hoping for the best in everything we do. I want to have days of plenty. I want there to be meaning to losing two people I love so much.
On Saturday when I ran my marathon I was of course thinking of Mom and Linz. I think of them often, but especially when I do things that are kind of big and scary. For almost my whole marathon I felt them with me. I felt like they were right there cheering me on. I started to get emotional a few different times just because it felt to good to know they were there. I know that a big reason I did so well in my race is that they were with me. I'm sure that they're with me, and everyone in my family, far more than we'll ever know. Every once in a while we're allowed to really feel them close. Its interesting that after I feel them close like that my heart hurts a little more than normal. Its like I'm reminded of how it felt to have them near and when they're gone again my heart hurts a little more than normal.
So yes, we've experienced some hard things. We miss Mom and Linz, a lot. But we can do hard things, especially with them by our side.
I know there are still lots of hard things to come. Let's face it, every day has hard things. But I like to think that there are a lot of good times out there too. So here's to the days of plenty ahead...
I never dreamed of this sorrow,
I never thought I'd have reason to lament,
I hoped I'd never know heartbreak,
How I wish I could change the way things went!
I wanted nothing but goodness,
I wanted reason to prevail,
Not this bare emptyness.
I wanted Days of Plenty.
But I refused to feel tragic,
I am aching for more than pain and grief.
There has got to be meaning,
Most of all when a life has been so brief.
I have got to learn something,
How can I give her any less?
I want life to go on.
I want Days of Plenty
You have to Believe,
There is reason for Hope.
You have to Believe
That the answers will come.
You can't let this defeat you.
I won't less this defeat you.
You must fight to keep her there,
Within you!
So Believe that she matters!
And Believe that she always will!
She will always be with you!
She'll be part of the days you've yet to feel!
She will live in your bounty!
She will live as you carry on your life!
So carry on,
Full of Hope,
She'll be there,
For all your Days of Plenty